Power Move #3

There are countless reasons why people don’t take initiative in relationships. We’re all busy. We’re all distracted. Life gets in the way and we don’t reach out.

Superconnectors do. They make an effort to start conversations and keep relationships going. This is perhaps the most important difference between the top 1% and the rest of us.

We heard from a wide spectrum of superconnectors about how they do this, and we were surprised by how simple and easy it can be. Something as basic as firing off a handful of simple text messages at the dog park can be a game-changer.

Who Got Me Here

Here are some valuable life lessons we learned from our guests this season.

Tod Sacerdoti: Episode 1

2x CEO with a $640 million exit and early investments in unicorns

• For him, “networking” isn’t the right word to describe his strategy. It’s all about genuine, meaningful connections built by bringing people together around shared interests and passions.
• Our conversation with Tod was packed with insights about the value of being a host, why curation is a relationship-building superpower, and the importance of reminding people you’re still alive.

Molly Graham: Episode 2

Technology executive whose resume includes helping both Google and Facebook navigate periods of intense scaling

• Her story is packed with lessons on the outsized power of being a friend and how curiosity can forge meaningful relationships quickly.
• Throughout her career, Molly has spotted interesting people and dug deeper, inviting them to coffees, reaching out for insight, and staying in touch.
• Don’t be the person who reaches out only when you need something.
• Check-in with people when you don’t need anything.
• We think people are busy and don’t want that ping, but everyone wants that email or text message letting them know you’re top of mind.

Nick Mehta: Episode 10

CEO of Gainsight, a company with 1200+ global employees and 20k growing customers

• Nick recorded an episode of Who Got Me Here, where he delivered a Networking Masterclass. He explained that one of the worst ways to network is being transactional. Relationship building is about looking for ways to help other people.
• He’s got a great saying. The worst time to network is when you’re looking for a job. The best time to network is always!
• He said basically any customer success leader can reach out to him for job advice, and he almost always does it. He said he probably does 10-15 calls with people each week, trying to help them do intros.
• Over ten years, he thinks he’s probably made 10k intros. That is an extraordinary amount of goodwill!
• It’s a great lesson. In life, you want to be in the business of doing favors. When you gladly make warm intros between your contacts, they’re more likely to return the favor and then some. The more you give, the more you get back!

Put it into practice

Over the next week, put 1-2 of these tactics into practice. Here is a blank coaching notes template which you can clone and edit, and here is the facilitator guide with an example of how you might fill it out.

Run a relationship refresh blitz

For a dedicated period of time — a week or a month — reach out to a handful of people every day. Your message can be simple, something like, “You crossed my mind, and I wanted to see how you’re doing.” A quick greeting can quickly become an interesting conversation, and the people you reach out to will appreciate the thought. Here is an example of a relationship refresh campaign.

Plan your follow-ups

After a friendly conversation at an event or a meeting, make a plan for when you’ll reach out and what you’ll say to the people you connected with. A simple calendar reminder that says something like “textJoanna about underrated Spanish wines” is plenty. The point is to keep the conversation going, not to say anything earth-shattering.

Go to events — and participate when you do

If you’re trying to establish yourself in a particular community or industry, it really helps to show up. Wherever you live, whatever you do, it’s likely that you can find some type of event that people you want to connect with will attend. Go! Introduce yourself, ask other people about themselves, and get in the mix.

Be a host

There’s incredible power in being the person who brings others together. It can be as simple as inviting a handful of like-minded people to a happy hour or a backyard barbecue. A few events with a small group of interesting people can forge connections that have a huge impact on your career.

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